wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
