Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I licked your asshole in confidence.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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