dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize