Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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