I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
