But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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