Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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