Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
