He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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