wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
My pussy is not your playground.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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