how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
