Umm I'm too high to move.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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