Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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