My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
