He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize