I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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