I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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