Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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