Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I think people are normalizing furries
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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