I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize