did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
