I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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