So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Don't make out with my wife yet
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize
