Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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