okay pat passed out under dana's car
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
