People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
