Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
