Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Help me help you realize you are a moron
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
