I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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