theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
