I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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