Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
