I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize