how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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