She is in my trunk
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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