come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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