I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize