just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
