I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
