I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
