laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
