i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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