yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
