just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
