just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
