I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize