Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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