Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
