I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
