Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize