If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Randomize
