Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
